Wednesday, January 13, 2010

glasses

Written on January 10th in the middle of the  busy night


But it won't listen
it doesn't listen
it refuses to hear
what I've got to say


It's against me
against me
against my faith
against whole of me


And I'm saying nothing
I'm quiet 
like the moment before the thunder that strikes down a thousand year old oak
It's dividing me 

on a quiet one
on a defeated one
on a pierced one
on pieces


and I'm alive...


Long lasting dream that cannot come true...simply because the world's round and there's no end and everything goes on, everything continues going on, forward...


I may cut my hair, stick plastic nails, colour those in red, green or yellow, put  as many make-up on my face, as I can, wear leather or nylon or silk or velvet...or nothing...it wont go backward...
No one's going to turn back his head, nether away
it's just that I'm not in front, not before him, not ahead of him, not on his side, 
I'm always somewhere behind...


I'm just there somewhere...short nails, no colour on those, my standard hairdo, my standard top and bottoms, and underwear and rubber clogs, keeping my mind on him, as much as time allows


I am


just am


no need to get the head turned back
no need to get attention


I have my long lasting dreams coming...
my sweet dreams...
and a lightning rod...



I might love....















my music....

"Northern Lad"

Had a northern lad
Well not exactly had
He moved like the sunset
God who painted that
First he love my accent
How his knees could bend
I thought we'd be ok
Me and my molasses
But I feel someting is wrong
But I fell this cake just isn't done
Don't say that you Don't
And if you could see me now
Said if you could see me now
Girls you've got to know
When it's time to turn the page
When you're only wet
Because of the rain
He don't show much these days
It's gets so fucking cold
I loved his secret places
But I can't go anymore
"you change like sugar cane"
Says me northern lad
I guess you go too far
When pianos try to be guitars
I feel the west in you
And I feel it falling apart too
Don't say that you Don't
And if you could see me now
Said if you could see me now
Girls you've got to know
When it's time to turn the page
When you're only wet
Because of the rain
When you're only wet
Because of the rain




Tori Amos